Ah, Pride Night – the theme night your favorite messy gay looks forward to most of all. Mainly because I enjoy putting on some wild makeup and an apropos tee-shirt or sweater and trotting my happy sapphic ass all over Northtown Center (or whatever other rink I can schlep my tin can of a car to).
With a night of LGBTQIA+ frivolity typically comes an amazing themed jersey from the home team. In fact, of the seven teams in the PHF, five came up with Pride-themed designs (La Force de Montreal and the Toronto Six did not have Pride jerseys this season). Four of the five were unique designs for this season, while one team decided to re-run their Pride sweaters from last year’s festivities. Naturally, as someone who loves rainbows and loves hockey (and loves women, for that matter), I decided to rank my personal faves for y’all as far as the PHF’s Pride sweaters are concerned.
(Note: I shouldn’t have to say this, but if you don’t agree, that’s fine; these are my rankings.)
Criteria
First, I took a look at the rainbow itself. Is the shading good? Are the colors correct? Are we as inclusive as possible (yes, this comes into play, and I’ll explain in a moment)? Do we think it’s too busy, or just right?
Next up, I examined the creativity of each jersey. Is it a fun concept, or the same-old same-old we’ve come to expect from a hockey sweater? Is it a unique take on a color scheme that can sometimes end up getting a bit repetitive? Embedded in this is a secondary metric: is the jersey better or worse than last year’s edition?
Lastly, the most important question: Would the gays wear it, or is it a major fashion faux-pas as far as we’re concerned? (For the record, every Pride jersey is a jersey we’d wear, most likely, but some are more wearable than others.)
Okay, are we ready? (Reader: omg, yes, can you shut up already.) Let’s go!
The Rankings
(from bottom to top, based on the above-mentioned metrics)
Fifth: Buffalo Beauts
Gaaaaaaaaaasp, did she REALLY just put the team she covers in the bottom slot?! (Yes; yes, she did.)
Now, hear me out: it’s not that I HATE these jerseys, because I sincerely don’t. I think they’re clean and well-done, and as far as the rainbow goes I’m so glad the Beauts’ jersey designer paid attention to inclusivity and used the Progressive Pride flag, which includes Black, Brown, and trans Pride colors. Especially in this day and age, where the LGBTQIA+ community (especially the trans community) is under attack, we need to make sure our trans, Black, and Brown siblings are represented, and as they did last year, the Beauts did that very well.
Unfortunately, the creativity for me is lacking otherwise. The lettering and accents are reminiscent of last year’s sweater, and this just reminds me of how much better that jersey was. Also, white sweaters in general are just not my favorites, not just because I’m a slob who stains white things within five minutes of wearing them but also because I feel like the pops of color get a little bit muted. Still, it’s a solid look, and I think the gays would definitely wear them.
Fourth: Boston Pride
So these were initially higher up on my list when I first saw them – I love the shading and the way the rainbow itself pops against the black jersey. There’s just something about black with a pop of color that makes me a little weak in the knees.
That said, creatively speaking it’s a biiiiiit lacking. I like the matching socks, I like the overall look of them, but compared to some of the cute little touches and unique spins some of these other teams have, these just are missing a bit of uniqueness (and, to be honest, one other team did the gradient a little bit better). I can see some of the more mainstream gays (and a lot of allies, to be honest) reaching for this one out of the mix simply because of the look of it.
Third: Connecticut Whale
Again, I LOVE the black with the rainbow, and I wish there were black jerseys more often in the PHF. I also love the clean break from the gradient idea with the simple stripes. It’s not the most inspired, and I also am a little overwhelmed with the Whale logos on the socks, but I do like the overall effect.
Also… the little rainbow water spout from the whale? So, so cute, and very creative, which is why they got a bump up above the Pride for me. More quirky and whimsical gays will definitely gravitate toward this one, mainly due to that freakin’ cute little whale.
Second: Metropolitan Riveters
Siiiiiigh, okay, let me explain myself.
First of all, they definitely are NOT getting creativity points. They compare perfectly with last year’s edition… because they are last year’s edition. That’s a bit of a lazy move in my opinion, and something that irked me when I found out.
That being said, I greatly enjoy the simplicity of the rainbow pinstripes – they’re not as chunky and overwhelming as Connecticut’s, and while I did make a point about the white sweater potentially washing out the pops of color, it works here thanks to the width of them.
Also, Metro is the only other team aside from Buffalo to use the Progressive Pride flag on their jerseys. That simply cannot be ignored, and I’m actually a bit disappointed that we didn’t see more inclusion of that specific flag from more PHF teams. For these reasons, faced with choosing between the two teams, I decided to go with Metro here despite my intense aversion to all things Rivs. Overall, I do definitely think the gays will appreciate the clean lines and vibrancy of the colors.
Still, there was one jersey that I remember audibly gasping at when I first saw it, and that belongs to…
First: Minnesota Whitecaps
The absolute beauty of this jersey. The creativity of the rainbow shades and the gradient. The placement. All of it spoke to me on a deep level, and while I know not everyone will agree, I think this took a concept that could be seen as played out and lazy and elevated it to such a degree that I could not stop looking at them. Maybe it’s also because I love bright, neon-adjacent colors, but I, a confirmed gay, would wear the hell out of these.
Which one is your favorite? Let me know in the comments or on social media.